Ministry as a Pastor’s Wife

Dear Pastor’s Wife,

After one of my first experiences of supporting my husband as he preached in our Sunday service today (listen to it here!), I have grown immensely in my adoration and respect for you.  You are a behind-the-scenes worker, toiling alongside your husband, one rarely recognized.  And while it is never about the recognition, it is ALWAYS encouraging to hear someone say that they see what you are doing to advance the kingdom of God.  I see you, dear pastor’s wife, and I commend you for what God is doing through you!

Today, I wanted to jot down a few points of practicality, things that I have learned through this experience with my husband.  Namely, several reminders that will benefit me (and hopefully others) as I prepare for my role as a pastor’s wife, Lord-willing.  If you are reading this and are a pastor’s wife, I hope you will do me an ENORMOUS favor and add a comment to this post with your own advice of ways to support one’s husband in ministry.  What have you learned by doing ministry with your husband, and how do you support him in his role?  I certainly have a LOT to learn, and am excited to hear from you!

Tim Kurtz sermon

  • Humbly recognize that you are a vital part to your husband’s success in ministry.  With God as your head, He is working through both you and your husband to draw people to Himself in Christ Jesus.  There is no way your husband can have a successful ministry if you are not with him in it, supporting him and cheering him on.  Humbly see that you are essential to your husband’s ministry, and praise God for it!
  • Get on your knees on behalf of your husband.  I wholeheartedly know and believe that prayer is one of the biggest tools in our arsenal to have an impact for Christ.  Use it.  Go before our gracious Father on behalf of your husband, and pray for God to mightily work through him (and you!).  I don’t know that there is anything more effective for you to do than to pray for your man.
  • Point your husband to Christ.  Is he struggling with writing the message for Sunday?  Is he dealing with doubt or insecurity, feeling incapable of the tasks at hand?  Speak truth to him from God’s Word and gently, lovingly point him to Christ.  Fixing his (and your!) gaze on Christ is what will produce endurance in him (and you!) and give you both the strength you need to endure.  “ Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart – Heb. 12:3.”
  • Do whatever it takes to ensure your husband is physically prepared for ministry on Sunday.  There is just something about preaching one – or several – messages from God’s Word at one time that wears a person out.  Your husband needs proper amounts of rest to prepare for the ministry he will be doing on Sunday!  As much as it depends on you, make sure he gets that rest.  Can you take care of the kids while he takes a nap?  Can you both aim to pray together on the night prior and go to bed earlier than usual?  Whatever it takes, help your husband by giving him rest.
  • Rejoice over the work that God is doing in your spouse’s life.  How did your husband’s message impact you?  Share it with him.  In what ways did he excel in sharing the good news of Jesus Christ, truth from His Word, with your fellow body of believers?  Point it out to him.  How could you provide constructive criticism to your husband in his ministry?  Gently speak truth to him, spurring him on toward love and good deeds (Heb. 10:24).

So…what is God teaching you as a pastor’s wife, or as you – like me – prepare for this role?  I would love to hear how He is equipping you!  Let’s learn together. 🙂

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2 thoughts on “Ministry as a Pastor’s Wife

  1. I have learned that during some seasons, the best way you can partner in ministry is to create a home that honors the Lord and is a safe haven for your man. Sometimes the wives feel like they have to be at every event and be involved in everything her man is, leaving her exhausted. However, the church did not hire her! Be okay with prioritizing caring for your littles, knowing that it frees your husband to be in ministry without worrying about an overextended wife.

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